It is what it is: a cat doing what a cat does.
Granted, cats can be assholes by nature. I could be mad at her snuggles. I could be inconvenienced at having to add the extra step of full-body lint roller to my morning routine. I could choose something else to wear at the last minute.
Or, I can just accept it for what it is (cat on clothes) and deal with what it is (roll it and wear it).
That's what I did, of course, when this happened a few weeks ago. I moved the cat, rolled the sweater and jeans, and went about my day. That's what it was - no big deal. It was amusing, actually, because I chose to see it that way.
It is what it is. I use that phrase a lot, especially in relation to relatively harmless scenarios like the one above. It's a phrase of acknowledgment and acceptance. It's not necessarily approval; in fact, it most often isn't. Still, when I find myself saying or thinking, it is what it is, I am choosing to tolerate imperfections (crabby people, for example) or situations that are less than ideal (asshole cats on my clothes, for instance).
Gosh, I've been saying it is what it is a lot lately. Too much.
I've been saying it in relation to a lot of things, a lot of aspects - personalities, requests, tasks, situations, obligations, all kinds of randomness.
Sometimes, there comes a point when it is what is is less about acceptance of a situation and more like resignation: What it is sucks and I am being taken advantage of, misunderstood, used, manipulated or otherwise mistreated in some way ... and I am expected to accept it because it will not change.
Here's the thing: Sometimes we have to decide if the what it is warrants the time, attention, loyalty and devotion being put into it.
I've been doing a lot of evaluating lately.
Sometimes it's worth it. Going back to my earlier example, I love my cat and accept that she can be a jerk who will sleep on my clothes.
Sometimes it's not. Negativity can be a poison, suffocating us until we break free and gasp fresh air.
We have choices. We have some measure of control over what we tolerate, perhaps more than we care to acknowledge. We can prune our lives much a like a gardener does weeds, extracting the aspects that stunt our growth and steal our nourishment. That may be what it is, but it's not for me ... and I will move on.
Sometimes it's hard to tell the weeds from the flowers. After all, a dandelion is a weed, but with one breath, it is a wish.
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| Obviously a dreamy stock photo. My world is covered in snow and ice right now. |
And a terrible source of allergies.
But it is what it is.
So then we ask ourselves the tough question about weeds/wishes/sneezes or any other aspects of our lives: Acknowledging what it is, is it right for me?
I don't offer answers, just this reminder that we all need guidance in discerning our best course of action: "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference." - from The Serenity Prayer.
