"Worry is a misuse of imagination." - Dan Zadra
My mind has been racing lately. I've had trouble sleeping; it's like my pillow is made of rocks. Aches are creeping up, pulling at my shoulders, ratcheting my neck, pain searing into the back of my skull. My attention flits and darts like a cat chasing a red laser dot on the wall (which is awesome to watch for entertainment, but hard for a girl to get through the day productively). Focus is difficult.
I try to be positive. I try to be upbeat. I try to show gratitude.
But sometimes ... not often ... but sometimes ... I worry.
It's all the usual stuff: finances, family, friends, the house, the car, sickness, world peace, projects, the future, the past ... blah, blah, blah.
Intellectually I know it is useless to worry. I also think it's selfish to worry and I often tell those I love who are worried to stop writhing, wallowing in self-consumption and worthless conjecture. Worry darkens our minds, chasing the light away.
I tell my loved ones to turn their worries over to God.
And I mean it.
Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times in every way. The Lord be with you all. - 2 Thessalonians 3:16
So why am I so lousy at taking my own advice?
<thinking>
<thinking>
... I got nothin' ...
But I will choose to take my own advice and turn over these troubles -real and imagined - to a higher power.
I will stop fretting.
I will instead do something productive and proactive these next few days to add a little light to a world that feels like it is closing in sometimes. I will say a prayer for someone in duress who has been on my mind. I will show my appreciation to someone who has been a help to me. I will give a heartfelt compliment to someone who could use a kind word. I will remind my son that he is awesome. I will kiss my hubs on the lips, even if I am in a hurry to get out the door in the morning. As I pass by, I will stop to scratch a cat - or a dog - behind the ear. I will let someone go in front of me in line at the McDonald's drive through.
Actually, I do these sorts of things all the time without giving them much thought. I'm really a great person. Seriously, I rock.
But now I will make a concerted effort to do these little kindnesses with a purpose. Doing so will hopefully add a little brightness to someone's day.
And in short time, the darkness of my worries will fade into the light.
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